Today's Sunday Funnies 9_20

  • Sep 20, 2020
  • Michael Blank
  • Category: Prayer Alerts

Do you remember the SUNDAY Funnies – they were colored comic strips that brought us laughter and a sense of fun from the “bad news” of the world as reported.

What we need now is some comic relief – light-hearted fun to help us LAUGH again!

Please enjoy these JOKES and share them with your others that you LOVE!

Here is a LINK = https://www.arcamax.com/thefunnies/blondie/  Actual comic strips

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Before you go any further, TODAY is NOT the DAY and I AM not the ONE!

 

I DO because I CAN – I CAN because I WANT TO and I want to because YOU said I could NOT!

 

Old AGE is when you still have something on the ball, but you are too tired to bounce it

 

The easiest way to find something you lost is to buy a replacement.

 

Have you ever noticed the Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL  ?

 

Also when you put two words together like   THE   and   IRS   it spells  THEIRS!

 

LORD, keep Your Arm around my shoulder and Your Hand over my mouth – Amen!

 

Imagine if you will a world where Nancy Pelosi’s hair salon has better video surveillance than Jeffery Epstein’s jail cell.

 

I had a really bad day. First my EX got ran over by a bus. Then I got fired from my job as a bus driver.

 

Sarcasm and Attitude are so much cheaper than therapy and bail money!

 

Why did the Rooster go to KFC?  He wanted to see a Chicken strip!

 

Momma, when can I give Daddy his Father’s Day Present?  Thursday honey, he delivers milk on Thursdays.

 

Last night was a sad time for baseball. A cardboard fan got hit in the head with a foul ball & later died at the hospital of COVID-19.

 

If satan lost his hair there would be hell toupee !

 

Did you know that ONE out of THREE Democratic Supports are just as stupid as the other two?

 

GREAT STORY:

A Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other,

and finally they got married, and had a little sweet

potato, which they called 'Yam'.

Of course, they wanted the best for Yam.

When it was time, they told her about the facts of life.

They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't get accidentally mashed, and get a bad name for herself like 'Hot Potato,' and end up with a bunch of Tater Tots.

Yam said not to worry, no Spud would get her into the sack and make a rotten potato out of her!

But on the other hand she wouldn't stay home and become a Couch Potato either.

She would get plenty of exercise so as not to be skinny like her Shoestring Cousins.

When she went off to Europe, Mr. and Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch out for the hard-boiled guys from Ireland .

And the greasy guys from France called the French Fries.

And when she went out West, to watch out for the Indians so she wouldn't get scalloped.

Yam said she would stay on the straight and narrow and wouldn't associate with those high class Yukon Golds, or the ones from the other side of the tracks who advertise their trade on all the trucks that say, 'Frito Lay.'

Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U. (that's Potato University ) so that when she graduated she'd really be in the Chips.

But in spite of all they did for her, one-day Yam came home and announced she was going to marry Tom Brokaw.

Tom Brokaw!

Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset.

They told Yam she couldn't possibly marry Tom Brokaw

Because he's just......

Are you ready for this?

Are you sure?

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OK!

Here it is!

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A COMMONTATER!!!

This story could be TRUE – it is puny in the best way!

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This one just made me SMILE!

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