Today's Sunday Funnies 6_21

  • Jun 21, 2020
  • Michael Blank
  • Category: Prayer Alerts

Do you remember the SUNDAY Funnies – they were colored comic strips that brought us laughter and a sense of fun from the “bad news” of the world as reported.

What we need now is some comic relief – light-hearted fun to help us LAUGH again!

Please enjoy these JOKES and share them with your others that you LOVE!

Here is a LINK =  Actual comic strips


I don’t have GRAY HAIR – I have WISDOM with Highlights!


If Elmer Fudd has NOT shot that wascally wabbit in 80 years then obviously his gun is NOT a problem!  Jus sayn’


We asked Sam NOT to sing, but Samsung anyway!


My grandma used to say – When you spank a child on the butt, you are just moving the brains back up where they need to go!


It’s called menopause for a reason.  MEN should PAUSE before they speak!


I’m reading a horror story in braille. Something bad is about to happen. I can feel it!


What is Orange and sounds like a parrot?  A carrot!


Why couldn’t the sailor play cards?  Because the Captain was standing on the deck!


What do you call two similar looking breasts?   Identities!


It’s a five minute walk from my house to the local bar. It’s a 45-minute walk from the bar to my house.  The difference is staggering!


What did the numerator say to the denominator when they broke up?  I’m so over you!


My friend was hit with a can of soda!  Good thing it was a soft drink!


The Bill of Rights is NOT a list of things our Government gives to us. It is a list of things that they CAN NOT take away from us.  Really?  Who knew?


So far the year 2020 is like looking both ways before crossing the street and then getting hit by a crashing airplane, we never saw coming.


Weeks ago my Mother-in-law began reading – The Exorcist. She said it was the most EVIL book she ever read. So evil in fact she could not finish it. Instead she took it over to the beach, ran down the fishing pier and threw it in the ocean. I went and bought another copy, ran the faucet over it and dunked it the sink. Then I left it on the night table next to her bed.  Jus sayn I might be asking for Forgiveness on this one!


What is the BEST Day to get to the beach?  SUNday of course!

What did the Pig say on a hot summer’s day?  I smell Bacon!


The difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED:

When you marry the right woman, you are COMPLETE!

When you marry the wrong woman, you are FINISHED!

When the RIGHT one catches you with the WRONG one, you are COMPLETELY FINISHED!  That’s a fact – jack!


The PAST, the PRESENT and the FUTURE walk into a bar!  It was tense!


So today at church a guy in a suit tried to drown me – I kid you not!  My family just stood there taking pictures.


Why did the pony have to gargle with salt water?  He was a little horse!


Never SING in the shower!!! Singing leads to dancing, which leads to slipping and slipping leads to falling and falling leads to paramedics seeing you naked!

Remember – DO NOT SING in the SHOWER!!